Teeth

So here's the thing with Peanut. There's a possibility that he'll be missing teeth or have teeth turning up where they're not supposed to be because of his cleft. We know this and there's really not much we can do about it so we're going to take the wait and see approach.

Our families are mostly aware of this as well but there are certain family members that just can't leave it alone.

They keep asking us what's going on with his teeth.

We have a doctor's appointment, they want to know if we asked the doctor whether he'll be getting teeth or not.

They ask if Peanut has had any x-rays to see if he has teeth.

When we say no, they tell us we should have x-rays done so that we can see what's going to be coming out, or not coming out as the case may be.

Teeth, teeth, teeth.

Arrgh. It's all I can do to keep my mouth shut and not say anything too sharp back to them. I mean, what would be the point of having x-rays done?? As far as I can tell, there wouldn't be any benefit to us see if his teeth are developing properly or not. They'd be baby teeth which he'd lose sooner or later anyway. So why would we want to expose him to all that radiation now if we're not actually going to get anything out of it? Grrrr. Think about it people...

Please excuse me while I wallow in self pity

I'm feeling kinda bummed right now. Please feel free to not read any further if you don't want to read my thoughts about why I'm such an anti-social butterfly. Don't say you weren't warned...

Orchestra has finished up for the year and I've come to a realisation that although I've been part of this community for the past 4 years, I haven't formed any real friendships there. I get the feeling that if I left this orchestra, the people there wouldn't give me a second thought. Don't get me wrong though. I'm not blaming anyone in the orchestra because they are a really wonderful group of people. It's more to do with me and the way I relate to people because I get the same sort of vibes from people at work and any other social situations I find myself in. I always find myself on the fringes, not quite knowing how to fit in or talk to people and too chicken shit to actually talk to people in case I say the wrong thing or offend people.

Sigh. I wonder if it's hereditary. My mum seems to be the same way with people and I always used to wonder why she has no friends. Now, I get it and I hate it. I don't want to be like her. She's everything I don't want to be... And yet, I can't seem to help behaving like her sometimes. A lot of the time actually. Geez. I'm doomed. Wonder if there's some sort of behaviour modification or hypnotherapy I can try to get the crazy out of my head :(

Hmm, I must be psychic

I had a dream on Sunday that the geneticist told us that neither me or D had the same gene mutation that Peanut has. It was a weird dream, with a whole bunch of other things going on in it but that was the part that I remembered most. On Monday afternoon, my phone rings at work and it's the genetic counselor. Our test results were in and neither of us had the gene mutation. How odd. I love random things like that. It's probably just a coincidence but it's nice anyway.

On other matters, Peanut seems to be doing quite well. We have another appointment at the cleft clinic next Thursday to see the plastic surgeon. I wonder if they'll have a look inside Peanut's mouth. We've been trying to get glimpses but he has a small mouth and he doesn't usually open it wide enough or tilt it at the right angles when he does open it so that we can actually see anything. How inconvenient of him...

So, I wonder how Peanut would feel about a little brother or sister... Although, I imagine he must love being an only child (and grandchild on my side of the family). Everyone adores him and spoils him rotten. But he's such a sweet kid, I can't imagine him actually turning into a spoiled brat. And he'd better not if he knows what's good for him. Heh.

Peanut's cleft repair

Peanut had his cleft palate repair surgery a few weeks ago. I promised myself that I would try to blog about it if I could but once we got there, it was hard enough to find the time to look after Peanut and ourselves, never mind finding the time to use the internet. Since then, I've been procrastinating so I'm only now writing an update on how it's all gone. Let's see if my fuzzy mummy brain will let me remember any of the details...

We went up to Sydney the day before for a pre admission clinic. Peanut was weighed and measured and we talked to one of the anaesthesia peoples about how he went with his previous surgeries, any heart/lung problems, etc. He also had his blood taken, which he didn't like at all. Not surprising really, I don't think anyone likes having their blood taken. Unless they're particularly masochistic. Lucky for him, they did it really quickly and it was over before he really had much time to cry. We also talked to the cleft clinic nurse and she helped us organise accommodation at the Ronald McDonald house for the night, which was really nice. We were a two minute walk away from the hospital so it was easy to get there the next morning. No need to worry about Sydney traffic or car parking just before Peanut's surgery.

Peanut had to be at the hospital at 7:45am the next morning and miracle of all miracles, we were on time! We sat around in the day surgery admission waiting area and talked to another anaesthesiologist who would be looking after Peanut during his surgery, the plastic surgeon and a nursing student who was following Peanut's case. With all the talking and waiting, it was about 9:30 before Peanut actually went into surgery. Poor little fellow was getting quite cranky and irritable since he had to fast and hadn't eaten anything since 1am. I went in with him while they put him under and he was quite good at first. He just sort of held the mask and looked at it for the first few seconds but then he started getting distressed so they turned up the gas and put him under quickly. I was led out once he'd gone to sleep and off we went to wait.

We went back to Ronald McDonald house to clean up and check out since we would be staying on the ward with Peanut for the next couple of nights. It was good actually. We had to clean up our room and bathroom and put all the linen in the wash for the next occupants so that gave us something to do to keep us from stressing too much about what was happening with Peanut. The distraction lasted until we were finished and checked out. I was starting to get antsy though since it had been awhile and we'd been told it was actually an easier surgery than his lip repair. We went back to the hospital and I decided that I may as well go express milk while we waited so off we went to one of the feeding rooms. Of course, they had to buzz us halfway through my pumping session to tell us that Peanut was out in recovery waiting for us. That's always the way isn't it? Anyway, I finished up as quickly as I could and off we went to go see our little Peanut.

My first impression of him was that he looked better than he did after the first surgery. Of course, his appearance wasn't as drastically changed with this one. He had his lip pit removed from his bottom lip but other than that, everything else wasn't actually visible. He was laying on his side, sleeping off all the drugs and looking quite peaceful. There was another kid there in recovery who was about 8 or 9 maybe and neither of his parents had turned up to see him. So he was old enough to realise that his parents weren't there and that the nurses couldn't get in touch with either of them. Poor kid. I don't know what happened with him because we were moved down to the ward shortly after but I hope his parents turned up for him. I can't imagine what they were thinking, not being there for their kid while he was having surgery. I know I couldn't leave my sweet little Peanut to go through something like that all by himself.

Anyway, we ended up on the same ward, in exactly the same bay as we did for Peanut's first surgery. Talk about deja vu. Lots of familiar faces in the nursing staff and the same room that I used last time to express milk. We had one fold out bed by Peanut's bedside and a parent's room on the ward upstairs so that we could both stay in the hospital while Peanut was there. I stayed by the bedside and D stayed in the parent's room, which was much nicer. for one thing, he actually got a bed and some peace and quiet! But we figured that was probably the best thing to do since he would be driving home once Peanut was discharged. That and his snoring sounds like a chainsaw and I didn't want the rest of the patients and parents staying on the same ward to want to kill us by morning...

Peanut was on a morphine drip for the first night and I think that kept his pain under control since he really only woke up once the first night and that was because a nurse disturbed him to take his temperature. The next morning though, he was all puffy from all the fluids and he'd been scratching at his face all night and all morning. Apparently, that's one of the side effects of the morphine. I went off to pump again in another room and while I was gone, Peanut decided he'd had enough of the drip and kicked it out. Go Peanut! They decided not to put it back in since it would be more trouble than it's worth and he went onto oral meds instead. Now that he was off the drip, we could take him out of the ward and get some fresh air and we did. There's nothing like being cooped up in a hospital to make you appreciate the outside world. We went took Peanut out in his stroller at every opportunity. We were in hospital for two nights to make sure that Peanut was eating alright and taking his antibiotics properly. Once the nurses decided he was doing well enough to go home, they discharged us and off we went! Two nights on a fold out sofa was more than enough for me so I didn't question it. We left the hospital, did some shopping at Victoria's Basement and Westfield Parramatta and then we headed off home.

It was nice to get back home. We'd tidied the place up before we left but as soon as we got home and started unpacking, it was like a tornado had hit. Makes you wonder why we bothered tidying up though since it was just going to get messed up again...

Peanut has been recovering well. He had a few more doses of pain medication over the first week and had to take antibiotics and put up with us squirting water into his mouth after every feed to make sure no food was getting stuck in his stitches. Now we're coming up to 3 weeks post-op and he seems to be doing well. I can still see a few stitches and healing patches on the top of his mouth every now and then when he lets me get a glimpse into there. We've all got our fingers crossed that he continues to heal well and doesn't get any infections or anything. Now our next challenge is to get him breastfeeding. I dunno how that's going to work since he's never been able to breastfeed. He seems to think my boobs are toys that he can pinch and twist when I let my guard down rather than somewhere he can get milk from so I'm not sure how much success we'll have with that. But I've got to try nonetheless since I still have a milk supply and it would be a hell of a lot nicer than expressing every 2-3 hours.

Hmm, go the epic length post. Maybe I should have made the effort to update while we were in Sydney after all. If you've managed to make it this far without falling asleep, good on you. I'll try not to inflict anymore novel length posts on the readers that I haven't managed to scare off yet...

Happy birthday Peanut!

We had a birthday party for Peanut last weekend. We invited family and a few friends and put on a BBQ with salads and other yummy bits and pieces. Our place was disorganised and messy as always so we had to spend the night before cleaning up and getting the BBQ and balcony ready for the next day. I think that took until about 2am or later to do. The next morning, we were up at about 7 or 8 to prepare all the food and get Peanut ready for his party. We had all the food ready around about the time we were planning to actually finish the party so that Peanut could have his nap. Hah! Needless to say, it didn't quite work out that way. But Peanut did manage to fit in a nap during his own birthday party while everyone was having lunch and chatting. Lucky fellow. I know I could have done with a nap at that time too!

Anyway, it was a nice day overall and Peanut enjoyed himself and all the attention that he was getting. Not to mention all the presents. I've never known him to take as much interest in baby toys as he has with the new stuff he got for his birthday. He used to always just go for our things - remote controls, phones, computers. His own toys never seemed to interest him, no matter how hard we tried to entice him to play with them. And it's not like the new things are wildly different from his old ones either. Oh well, maybe it's just the novelty of having new things and he'll be back to grabbing at our electronics soon enough...

I can't believe a year has passed so quickly. It doesn't seem like that long ago that we were just coming home from the hospital with our lives turned upside down in more ways than one! More on that later I think...

Oh the big bellies...

I go to a yoga class that finishes just before a pre-natal yoga class begins so I always see a few women with big bellies turning up early every week. Is it weird that I feel a bit of longing and envy over those big bellies? I miss being pregnant now that it's over and there's no telling when we'll be going through it again. Despite what other women generally say about being pregnant, it's not all morning sickness, swollen feet and ankles, being fat and all the other nasties that you always hear about. I quite liked it, having a little person in my belly that would give me kicks throughout the day and get hiccups quite regularly so that I could watch my belly jump up and down with the movement. And don't get me started on the anticipation and excitement of being on this new journey and knowing that you'll have something so very worthwhile at the end of it. I did a lot of yoga and calmbirth relaxations in preparation for the birth of Peanut and it was so nice to be able to take some time out of every day to relax and think about what was to come.


I wish we could start trying for a sibling for Peanut but we want to wait for the results of our genetic testing first since Peanut was born with a genetic condition called popliteal pterygium which was what caused his cleft. It's a different mutation of the same gene that also causes Van der Woude syndrome. The gene is inherited in an autosomal dominant pattern so if one of us is carry a mutated copy of this gene, there's a chance we could have another kid with the same mutation. Although, neither of us has any visible symptoms, there's still a chance one of us could be carrying the mutated gene so I want to wait until we know for sure before we do anything. It really sucks having to put our lives on hold like this but I hope we get the results soon. I'm not sure what we'll do if one of is does have it. I guess we'll cross that bridge if we come to it...

Oops, I've been slack

It's been over a week since I updated. My bad. I've changed my work schedule a bit so I'm full time two days a week and doing half days for the rest. Been a bit tired the last week trying to get used to the new schedule but it should be all good soon. More hours = more pay, just in time for my new improved (for the bank that is) mortgage repayments to swallow the extra pay up :(

While we're on that topic, I'd like to have a whinge about how high the house prices are here in Canberra. Not that I expect much else since Canberra is full of well paid public servants but that doesn't stop me complaining. For us average folks, getting a nice place in a decent location is pretty difficult to do on one income. If we plan to have another little one in the near future and/or I get into med school, we'd have to survive on D's income alone. Sure, we could probably afford a nice little place out on the very edges of Canberra but I don't really want to spend hours every day going to and from work. Especially since right now, I'm only about 10 mins away from work. So the idea of doubling or tripling my travel time does not appeal.

I have to say though, in spite of the lack of space, living in an apartment that's close to heaps of shops, restaurants and other things has been great. But I can see Peanut needing a little extra space to play as he grows bigger and more interested in the world around him. Even now, he loves being taken out on the balcony for some fresh air and to watch the cars go past. In fact, if you take him to the balcony door, he'll unlock it and open it and start reaching for the outside. So I'm not sure how much longer we can stay here. I'll be sad to leave the convenience of this place and the friends I've made here though. But I'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Working mummy guilts

I'm increasing my hours at work from next week onwards. I'm adding another 6 hours a week because I'm thinking that I'll build up to going back full time slowly rather than doing it all at once. In theory, that should be  less of a shock to my schedule but we'll see how well it works in practice. I feel guilty being a part time worker sometimes. Even though I do less hours now, I still feel like I should be doing the same amount of work that I used to do when I was full time. I know it's not reasonable to feel that way but there it is. I feel especially guilty when I have to leave work for other people to do because I need to get home. But then, if I stay at work late, I feel bad for not being home for my little Peanut! Sigh. The joys of being a working mum hey?

Speaking of the joys of being a working mum, I'm still expressing milk at work every day I can book some time in the carers room. The other day, I had a male colleague ask me if I was bothered that there wasn't all that much privacy in and around the carers room. I wasn't actually sure what he was talking about. I mean, the glass door is mostly frosted and people know not to peek in through the slit that isn't so it's private enough right? But he meant that people could see me going in and that everyone knew what I was doing because I wash up my collection kits at the kitchen afterward. I guess he thought that might be embarrassing for me but to be honest, it doesn't really bother me. I'm happy to explain why I do it too if anyone asks (it's much better for Peanut, especially since he has a higher risk of ear infections due to his cleft and breastmilk can reduce the risks) and most people are understanding about this. After all, it's better to prevent the sickness in the first place if you can than to have to take time off to deal with an upset, sick kid right?

Overall, my work seems to be pretty accepting and supportive of my part time schedule and milk expressing and I'm thankful for that. It does make things a little easier for me. I've worked in places in the past that were pretty unforgiving and inflexible when I was younger and had a lot less going on in my life. Looking back at these places and comparing them to where I am now, it makes me glad that I'm not working in those places anymore. If I was still at one of these places, I don't think I'd be back at work yet. Either that or I'd have to give up expressing and give Peanut infant formula instead, which is something I don't really want to do.

The Peanut and his cleft

Peanut's cleft palate repair is a little over a month away now. I'm looking forward to having it over and done with but at the same time, I'm not really looking forward to putting him through another surgery. It has to be done for his own benefit of course, but I still wish it wasn't necessary in the first place. After this surgery, we should hopefully be able to get on with our lives until he is about 8 or 9 when he'll have to have a bone graft to close up the gaps in his upper jaw.

Looking over pictures of Peanut from when he was born up until the day of his lip repair and comparing those to him now, it's amazing to see how much he's changed. In a weird sort of way, I miss his cleft and the big wide smiles that he was able to give us because his mouth wasn't all joined together the way it was supposed to. I know other people who didn't know any better probably looked at him and thought 'Ergg, what's wrong with him??' but I thought he was perfect the way he was. Well, I still think he's just perfect but of course, I'm more than a bit biased. He seems to have recovered from the lip surgery really well though and he's looking really good now. If he didn't still have a bit of redness going up into his nostrils, you'd never know he had surgery. He'd just look like a kid with a slightly flattened nose...

New wardrobe guidelines

So having come to the conclusion that I need new clothes, now I need to figure out what sort of new clothes I'm going to get. The last thing I need is to replace the dorky crap that my mother bought for me with similar dorky crap that I buy for myself...That being said, there are a few requirements that all pieces of clothing applying for a spot in my closet need to meet:

1. Cost. If it's going to cost me more than say, $30, it'd better have some pretty damn special qualities. Like, maybe self cleaning/ironing. Or giving me the ability to fly...

2. Low maintenance. If I can't chuck it in the washing machine and dryer and have it come out relatively wrinkle free, it's out. I mean, do I look like I have time to be ironing my clothes in between all the other things I have to do??

3. Not dry clean only. If I have to continue to pay to keep the damn thing clean, forget about it. The only time I will ever buy something that's marked dry clean only is if it's also marked as $10 or less. That way, it can take it's chances with the washing machine and if the machine wrecks it, I won't be too devastated.

4. Must not look like anything I would find in my mother's wardrobe. 

And that's all. I'm not asking too much am I?

Time for a wardrobe overhaul I think

I've realised that I'm a bit of a pack rat. I've been going through my closet trying to decide which clothes I want to through out and even though I haven't worn some of them in ages and probably won't wear them again, I still can't bring myself to throw them out. I mean, just because I don't want to wear them now, doesn't mean I won't want to wear them in future! What if I want to wear them again 10 years down the track?!

I've also got a whole heap of dorky shirts and other bits and pieces that my mum bought for me years ago. These I don't mind throwing away so much. In fact, I'm actually quite keen to get rid of these because I don't really see eye to eye with my mum on a lot of things and it seems silly that she still has so much influence when it comes to the clothes that I wear. I'm just too much of a cheap skate to go out and buy new things while I still have stuff that isn't falling apart. And nice clothes are sooo freaking expensive! How the hell am I supposed to replace my whole wardrobe when shirts and stuff will cost me about $70 each?? Maybe I need a higher paying job...

Oh the memories

I just went back and read over my old blog. Eeep. I'm wondering if I should delete it or at the very least, sanitise some of the posts in it since it would probably offend a few people if they should ever find it and link it back to me...

I'm somewhat amused and a little horrified at the same time to see the sorts of things that went through my head and the fact that I thought it was appropriate to post all of it online. And I'm pretty sure the stuff I posted was me censoring myself as best as I could at the time as well. Yikes. I think (hope?) my brain to keyboard filter is functioning a little better these days though. Although, sometimes, I feel like it's working a little too well to the point where all that I can write about is the dry and boring things that won't offend anyone! Maybe tomorrow, I'll post about the weather. How awesome would that be?

I'm also a lot more conscious about using any sort of identifying information these days. Privacy and anonymity on the internet didn't really worry me a few years back. But nowadays, I'm not only writing about myself, I have a little Peanut and husband who are the two most important people in my life so I will mention them every now and then. It wouldn't really be fair of me to compromise their privacy for my own need to blab about my life to random people on the internet (no offense to random internet peoples who might be reading this!). So that's why I will continue to refer to my little boy as Peanut. I'll have to come up with an appropriate nickname for my husband as well. Heh.

Here we go again

Ah, it's the weekend again. And a long weekend to boot. I have all these great plans about what I'm going to get done on the weekend now that I don't have to go to work for a couple of days. I'm going to:

1. Practice the violin every day
2. Catch up on some washing
3. Clean up the kitchen and living room
4. Sort through the piles of junk I've been collecting for the past couple of years
5. Figure out what I need to work on for the gamsat
6. Plan our meals for the coming week
7. And go grocery shopping for this meal plan
8. Spend some time with my hubby and Peanut

It's now Saturday night and so far, I've only done 1.5 out of 8. Violin practice is out of the question now that Peanut is in bed. Oh well, there's still 2 more days for me to work on this list. Meh. I'm sure I'll be able to get at least half of it done by the time I have to go back to work...

Where did the week go?

Two long weekends in a row, how awesome is that? I could get used to this 4 day working week thing :) Although, I don't feel like I got much done this week at all.

It's times like this I sometimes wonder why I'm going to work when I could be staying at home with my little Peanut. In one more month, he'll be a year old and yet, it only seems like yesterday that I was all fat and pregnant and wishing he'd come already so that I could hold him in my arms. This past year has just flown by so quickly. I've gone from being heavily pregnant, to getting used to a newborn baby with a cleft lip and palate that I was so completely unprepared for, to watching him develop oh so quickly from being a tiny little lump of a newborn to this almost walking little bub that he is now. And how much am I missing out on now that I spend 5 hours or so a day at work away from him??

Damn these thoughts, they make me doubt this idea of me going to med school and becoming a doctor. After all, it would mean even more time away from my little man and I'm already missing him on my part time work schedule. How would I handle full time study and then the training that follows? I don't have any delusions that this could be anything but incredibly tough and difficult, even if I did manage to get into med school in the first place. But on the other hand, I don't want to walk away from the possibility and spend the rest of my life wondering if I could have done it after all. I've done similar in the past and I know I'll just end up regretting it and possibly resenting the situations/people/thoughts that stopped me in the first place.

I have to try at the very least. After all, how can I teach my little Peanut to follow his dreams and chase his goals in life if I can't do the same thing myself?

Not so fast food

Thought we'd be lazy today and just pick up some lunch from a fast food joint, which shall remain nameless. We were out at Floriade checking out the flowers, as you do when Spring comes and the days get nicer and the flowers come out. We figured since we were going to be a little short on time, we'd just get some take away for lunch so that we could concentrate on giving our little Peanut his lunch and then getting him down for an afternoon nap. Unfortunately, we didn't allow for the incompetence of fast food workers in our well laid plans...

Quin: *places order*
Fast food worker (henceforth known as FFW): $6 burger + $7 burger + $6 chips... That'll be $19.
Quin: *hands over $50 note*
FFW: *enters it all in the till which says to give me $31 in change*
FFW: *looks at till in puzzlement. Takes out $30 in change, hands it to me and walks off*
Quin: Ummm, excuse me... Hello? You short changed me by $1. Can I have my $1 please?
FFW: Oh, sorry! *presses random buttons on till but can't get it open*

Anyway, we eventually sort that all out and I go and sit down to wait for my order. I figured the guy was just new and left it at that since I'm sure we've all been there and done that at some point or other in our lives. No biggie, mistakes happen right? BZZZT. WRONG! I should have taken that as a sign to check my order before I walked out of there. Silly, naive, trusting little me, I just walked out of there with my bag thinking that all my food was in the bag that they handed me. It wasn't until we got home and unpacked it that we realised a burger was missing. Sigh. So we had to make another trip back to the store and get the burger they owed us. Lucky they believed me when I said we weren't given the second burger and they made up another one for me.

I think in all, we wasted half an hour or more getting this food. And the first burger was cold and shitty by the time we got home with the second one. So it was a pretty crapola lunch all round. That'll teach me for thinking that fast food will actually save me any time. Next time, I'm going straight for the instant noodles if I need a quick lunch. At least, I know I won't screw those up. And if I do, it'll be no one's fault but my own...

Because life just isn't hard enough yet

I'm planning to do the GAMSAT next year and apply for med school. I always wanted to be a doctor when I was young but I sort of lost my way through high school and college. When I got my craptastic UAI after year 12 (and believe me, it was well deserved due to lack of effort and motivation and untreated shortsightedness), I thought I'd pretty much shut the door on any hopes of becoming a doctor. Hell, I thought I'd shut the door on uni full stop, it was that bad. Lucky for me, my parents were able to pay for me to do a couple of units of my IT degree full fee so that I could use the results of those to gain a place at uni.

I only found out earlier this year that post grad medicine was actually a possibility, assuming my GPA is good enough and I kick GAMSAT butt. I do have a fail in my academic transcript that could screw me over a bit. And it was for a class I didn't even need to do so now I'm kicking myself for doing it and not withdrawing when it looked like I wasn't going to be passing...

Anyway, now I'm looking at what I need to do to prepare for this exam. I think first thing I need to do is to brush up on my science knowledge a bit since I'm pretty rusty there. And practice essay writing. And somehow prepare for the reasoning in humanities and social sciences section. And since I've spent most of this year procrastinating and doubting myself, I've got about 6 months or less to do all this preparation. Should be no worries fitting that in around my work and my family responsibilities right?

Lol, wish me luck hey? I'm sure I'll be back here whinging and procrastinating when things get too hard...

Is this lame or just typical?

We had a BBQ at our place today. One of our friends was meant to come but he had to clean his room up before he could leave the house. So what's wrong with this picture? Well for one, he lives in a pigsty of a room most of the time. He doesn't clean it up unless his parents do something drastic, like effectively grounding him til it's done. And did I mention he's in his early 30s? Well he is and he doesn't seem all that keen to move out of home in spite of the occasional grounding when his room gets messy enough for his parents to notice.

I know statistically, people are staying at home with their parents for longer and longer these days but to me, it just seems wrong to be living like an irresponsible teenager when you're in your 30s. I know I wouldn't like having my parents watching my every move and doling out punishments to me when they think I've crossed the line. In fact, that was part of the reason I decided I had to get a place of my own and get the hell outta there! And I thought I'd left it pretty late to be moving out in my mid 20s when I knew heaps of people who were out of home at 18 or so!

So why do people live at home for so long these days? Is it because we have a longer life expectancy and don't feel the need to grow up as quickly? Or the fact that it's just about impossible to actually buy a place of your own unless you live at home and save all your pennies for a house deposit? Or is it the parents who are encouraging their kids to stay at home for longer so they can delay having to find a life for themselves once all the kids have left? Or some other reason that hasn't occurred to me yet?

I might be going senile

We were trying to decide what to have for dinner tonight and I thought it'd be nice to have some curry since we haven't had that in awhile. Now, the last time we had curry, we got it from somewhere close to us (i.e. we didn't drive halfway across town to go to our usual favourite). Anyway, this new curry place was good but neither of us could remember where it was or what it was called. We were totally 100% convinced it wasn't this place in the city that we'd eaten at before though. We went over it and over it trying to remember where we'd gone, what we'd ordered, blah blah blah. Anyway, turns out it was the place in the city we were both convinced it wasn't. Is this just another symptom of mummy brain? If so, does it affect men too??

Sniffles and snot and general yuckiness

We've all been a little sick for the past couple of weeks. I'm almost over it now but my husband (let's call him D) is still coughing and my little peanut is still waking up with a snot encrusted nose. I heard him coughing a bit last night too so it sounds like he's still trying to get rid of his cold.

Peanut woke up for a feed at about 7 this morning and it looks like he's gone back to sleep again. D's fallen asleep on the floor of Peanut's room and he's snoring away like a chainsaw. Not that this is anything out of the ordinary. He snores at the best of times so it's no surprise he's snoring now that he's sick. The only real surprise is that I'm not totally deaf on one side from sleeping next to the snoring all these years :(

Hey, who turned out the lights??

Apartments + halogen down lights + a dodgy builder and his dodgy electrician mates = Profit????

We bought this apartment brand new and these lights have been nothing but trouble since we moved in. Heaps of the transformers in the roof have blown and needed to be replaced because they were cheap and nasty and not made to last (but then again, is anything made to last these days??). Now we're starting to find some of these lights and their transformers don't seem to have enough space around them in the ceiling space. Fire hazard anyone? Two of the lights in our living room are out of commission because they just look too dangerous to keep running. One of them is burning a hole in the air conditioning tube-y thingo that's running above it. The other has burned a hole in it's transformer and so last night, our lights kept overloading and turning off.

Sigh. Bet there's a bunch of electricians out there that are just rubbing their hands in anticipation at the amount of work they'll have coming out of this place for the next few years. Meanwhile, we'll just have to live with a bunch of wires hanging out of our roof until we can get someone in to fix these lights and make them safe to use. Awesome.

Unexpected visitor

Don't you hate it when people come over and you're not expecting them?? Our place is a mess, we've just had a whole heap of Tupperware arrive today and are in the process of washing it and sorting what will go in each container so there's containers and lids everywhere. And I'm on the breast pump, boobs exposed to the world. That's an awesome look right there. I hear it's the latest trend for this spring...

Anyway, you can imagine this is not the best time to have a distant friend from out of town turning up to use the internet because he's just arrived in town and hasn't booked any accommodation yet. Who the hell travels to another state without arranging where he's going to stay beforehand? Sure hope this wasn't his surreptitious way of trying to bum some free accommodation from us while he's here. I mean, hey, I'll be on and off the pump all evening and tomorrow morning. But don't let that stop you. Feel free to stay and enjoy the boobie show every couple of hours!

And there she is. My bitter, twisted and cynical side. I knew I couldn't keep her hidden for long.

Spring is here!

Well, officially it's the first day of Spring! Hooray! Bring on the warm weather and sun and flowers and pollen! I do like Spring though, in spite of the pollen and other itchy things that blow around at this time. The days are brighter and longer, I don't have to wear layers and layers of clothing that make me feel like an overstuffed pillow and the trees and flowers are blooming. Ah, Spring is such a wonderful time :)

Damn you cold germs

Don't you hate it when people come into work and cough and splutter all over you? Who wants to bet that the tight asses are saving up their sick leave so they can use it when they're 'sick' rather than when they're really sick? Anyway, last week, there were quite a few people at my work sick and spreading their germs around. Sharing is caring, isn't that what they say? Some of these germs must have hitched a ride home with me because I spent the weekend feeling a little under the weather. I did try oh so valiantly to fight it off but alas, this morning, I woke up with a sore throat and runny nose. So I figured I'd go into work and share the love... I am such a hypocrite hey? I did have some work that needed to be finished today though so I have an excuse. Although, now that I'm feeling worse than I was this morning, I might have to take tomorrow off...

Driving fail

So, today I managed to scrape under the front bumper of our car coming out of a driveway and also get beeped for turning in front of oncoming traffic at the traffic lights. All within the space of 5 minutes. Lucky I was only a couple more minutes away from home otherwise, who knows how much more trouble I could have gotten myself into. The scrape was me coming out of a driveway I've been in and out of many times before, all with no problems. So I have no idea how I managed to do it at such an angle and I could bump the front of the car on the road. I blame the car for being so damn low to the ground in the first place. Bah.

Not giving way at the lights though, that was just me not paying attention and also forgetting the rules of the road because I don't drive enough. How on earth did I get my license again?? This is why we should be retested every time we have to renew our licenses. At least that way, I'd have a reason to get out and practice driving more often so I don't forget important things like who gives way when, how to reverse park, why stalling at the traffic lights is bad when you're at the front of the extremely long queue and how not to react when everyone is beeping at you and cursing in your general direction...

Sigh. Must find a way to make a crap ton of money so I can just pay someone to drive me around. That way, I can get my menace self off the roads and someone else gets paid to be my chauffeur. It's a win-win for all involved!

Zzzzzz

Have you ever been so tired you've managed to fall asleep without realising that you've done so? That happened to me the other day at work. One minute, I was sitting there trying to figure out how to fix something and the next I was dreaming that I was still working but really, I had nodded off and was sitting there with my eyes closed and possibly slack jawed and drooling. Cause I'm classy like that. I have no idea how long I stayed there like that because I was dreaming about being awake and staring at my computer screen. What brought me back to the land of the living was someone coming up to me and asked me some random question. Then I had to mentally scramble around, trying to answer the question in a way that didn't make it too obvious that I'd just been dozing off at my desk and wasn't quite with it just yet. Though I'm pretty sure that since my work mate has eyes, he could see what I'd been doing.

I so totally need to start getting to bed earlier. Or maybe I just need to invest in a couple of pairs of those Homer Simpson glasses with the eyes painted on so I can have a snooze behind them...

Mischievous peanut

Since my cheeky little peanut has worked out how to crawl and pull himself up using coffee tables, entertainment units, chairs, cabinets, well you get the picture, life has been getting a lot more complicated. For one thing, we've had to slowly baby proof this place to keep him from getting into things he shouldn't be touching. And it's not just the safety stuff either (power points, cables, etc), anything that we don't want to get drooled on, puked on, thrown onto the floor (that's right, you keep far away from my camera and laptop now, you hear??), or beaten into a pulp by pudgy little food/drool covered baby hands needs to be moved out of reach. Heaven forbid if I want to use my laptop on my lap. As soon as he sees me on the couch with my laptop, he makes a beeline for me.

Peanut: Oh mummy, I see you're using my favourite toy in the whole wide world!!

Quin: Ahhhh!! Peanut attack!!11!11ONE!!

Peanut: Om nom nom nom nom, these ports on the side sure are tasty! Let me add some regurgitated milk for that extra special flavour! *drools/pukes*

Quin: *mad scramble to finish what she's doing and pack up the laptop*

Peanut: But you can't be done yet! I've still got some playing to do! Here, let me help you with what you were doing! *sfdknvvs smzdz.dclmfdm;,vxcz sdl;lmda;,xcz*

Laptop: Unknown USB device. Pukey baby drool is not a recognised device. Please reinstall your drivers and try again.

Quin: *Sigh*

So, anyone want to buy a laptop? Slightly used. USB port might or might not be functional. Anyone? Anyone??

So very tired...

Damn, weekends are tiring. Friday night comes and seeing as I don't have to get up early the next day, I figure I can stay up a little bit later and get a few more things done. And by getting things done, I mean I catch up on Farmville (yes, it's very sad that I'm still playing this), surf the web, read blogs and otherwise waste time on things that I don't get to do during the day while I'm at work. Sure could do with a few more extra hours in the day. But then, I'd probably waste those anyway. Maybe I could take up Guild Wars again. Yeah, because going backwards and revisiting old addictions is such a good idea... Faarrrkkk... So very tired and not making much sense. Gonna go get ready for bed methinks.

Hello world!

Well, it looks like I'm a little late to this blogging game. Had to try so many URLs before I got one that wasn't taken. Damn you, procrastination! Anyway, I've been thinking about doing this for awhile but signing up just seemed too hard. I used to keep a diary as a kid and it's been most amusing to go back and see all the odd things that used to go through my mind when I was younger. It's been years though since I've done any sort of writing and I figured it was time I started again. For one thing, if I don't write things down, I tend to forget them after awhile. That's right. Not even thirty yet and I'm already going senile. Go me.

So. Here we are. You know, this is a lot harder than I remember. I think I'm a bit out of practice when it comes to getting my thoughts out in a coherent form. Yeah, don't ask me how the hell I get by at work. I just do my best to avoid anything that involves writing or editing documentation. As a computer nerd, it's not hard to do that most of the time since I'm usually neck deep in (buggy) java code or tangled up in some big ass SQL statements. But occasionally, I have to review requirements (fun stuff) so that I know what the hell I'm meant to be building. Or even worse, I have to document what I've done (oh, the horror). I think working in IT has just about sucked out all the passion I ever had for anything computer related. Funny how getting paid to do something you thought you loved can show you just how much you can hate it isn't it?

Anyway, it's Friday today. Hooray! A whole weekend of freedom! Well, as much freedom as you can have with a 9 month old who's starting to get into everything. Ugh. Why can't babies stay immobile until they have enough sense to not chew on power cords or forget that since they needed the coffee table to pull themselves up, they need to bloody well keep HOLDING ON once they get to standing position?? Sigh. Meanwhile, we've had to baby proof our apartment as much as possible. Moving cables and power cords to places that can't be reached by little baby arms, tidying up piles of junk so they don't get nommed on, etc etc, blah blah blah, baby proofing, blah. This place has never been neater. Well, not since we moved in anyway. But in spite of the relative neatness, I think our interior decorating leaves much to be desired. Oh well. Can't see myself having enough time to do anything about it in the near future...